View Full Version : Support my first Book

09-24-2015, 09:19 AM
Miss Diagnosed
By Gabrielle B-G 2015


This is a good book. I hope people think so!

09-27-2015, 02:39 PM
Page not found? May be my device.

09-29-2015, 02:12 AM
Miss Diagnosed
By Gabrielle B-G 2015


This is a good book. I hope people think so!

You never fooled me. I always knew that you were perfectly fine.

10-02-2015, 11:57 AM
Page not found? May be my device.

Nope. It's not showing up for me either.

12-20-2015, 01:57 AM

Love is Madness- is the new title and here is: http://www.lulu.com/shop/gabrielle-b-g/diary-of-a-crazy-girl/paperback/product-21621877.html

I discounted the books so they are the less expensive. Thanks for the support everyone!! :)

12-20-2015, 02:10 AM
For the Love of Lucifer
I am a twenty-two year old woman who struggles with schizophrenia. I see a therapist, and recently we began doing meridian tapping and eye movement therapy. Itís amazing what the mind is capable of doing when trust is formed and you feel safe. The mind also has a natural survival mechanism on its own and possibly the greatest wonder of the universe. Sometimes, the amount of stability I enjoy in life makes me question whether I were schizophrenic at all, but I take medication and I survive. Surviving for as much time I can is my absolute goal. I also am learning in the process. I am learning about human nature and how evil is inherent to many situations. Iíve learned that coming to terms with hatred, cruelty, and evil helps us process reality and choose what we most appreciate in life. In my case it is justice, love, and honesty.

When I was fourteen I was struggling with racing thoughts, and I longed to fit into an awkward social scheme of behavior. Tight jeans, make-up, and relationships were hard for me to grow accustomed to. I remember that I watched a movie about a gothic girl who never fit in, and I identified so much with her on a deep level. She cut herself and disregarded the norms of society by drawing graffiti on the windows of a shopping mall. It was there that she made a friend with a man who helped her come to terms with her identity. Being young, the moral of the story was somewhat lost to me. I didnít become gothic, but I absorbed myself in writing alone every day.

My stories, although I forget many of them, were somewhat erratic. After I went to a small Quaker boarding school, since my parents were afraid I couldnít handle an over-crowded public school, I had even more issues with finding myself. I longed to fit in, but many of the students teased me and disregarded things I found important. Most of all, I was struggling not only with racing thoughts and neediness, but repressed experiences from my early childhood life.
During my episode, I had a sudden feeling of bright illumination. I didnít necessarily believe I was Jesus, but that I had the right to think I was. So I stubbornly sat down in the bathroom stall of a hotel and prayed.

My parents hospitalized me, and although it was probably necessary, I was not able to handle the abuse of staff members at this hospital. I was isolated for not cooperating, they didnít follow any procedure, and it was all to make me compliant with a system I felt was flawed. I believed I was strong enough to overcome my schizophrenia. But now, looking back, I believe it was probably the best thing for me despite the abuses. I was able to get back on my feet, and struggle to regain my sense of self. I learned to adapt, as the medication I found helped me. It balanced me in such a way that I could bring clarity and retrospection to my irrational fears. It took time, though.
I know there are some people who think that mental illness is just a sickness, but despite the truth about brain imbalances, there is a social context that the public needs to be aware of on a fundamental level. The basic social context is that hospitals should not be places where abuses can happen, it should not be a system made for compliance but a hospital needs to be a place to treat someoneís emotional and psychological hurts in many ways.

There are many people who I know that feel afraid to go to hospitals because they are not always the safest places. They say they would like a retreat, a place of safety in nature, or somewhere they can write out their feelings. I believe mental health has become too medication oriented. Not everyone has the money to seek out a good therapist. I am fortunate to have a family who cares about me, and helps support me so that I am a very stable individual. Yet, madness is almost an evil in and of itself. It is another evil necessary in the struggle of humanity.

Evil is necessary for the survival of humanity as a race and culture. That is to say that without evil there would be no night, no stars, nor a balance of opposites. Free will necessitates evil because as humans, we make mistakes by nature. To be a healthy human being in this world, we must come to terms with our demons. Those who repress their demons, whether consciously or unconsciously are merely lying to themselves. Evil exists within us all and is inherent to the human condition. We can choose to resist the temptation to do wrong, but in order to do that we must know what is wrong. Although evil deeds and purposely cruel actions lead to chaos, that chaos will eventually settle back into order. To know oneís own evil, is to know the temptation that every human possesses. Why would any individual possess such a quality? Evil is a part of evolution. It is something that we need not overcome by rising above it, but by integrating the pieces of our nature into the whole. By discarding evil, it only transfers to another source.

Energy is neither created nor destroyed, but knowledge conquers all. Conscious will is the path to individual enlightenment. The yin and yang of life, the cosmic egg, the revolving circle, and the morning star all point to the symbolic truth of the nature of evil. Evil is primal, both eternal and overwhelmingly powerful. It brings saints to their knees. I do not think that God, as a paternal far-reaching force in the sky, could prevent evil from coming to mankind. Evil is just as a part of God as madness.

Is madness evil? Madness is a part of the human condition, and there-fore an aspect of survival. I don't consider it evil in the sense, although I'm not certain that it isn't necessary. How can a complete destruction of the mind, or the nuclear bomb dropped on a third world country ever be good? Itís not good, but it teaches humans to use their hands and their minds to find alternatives. When faced with an evil such as war, those who think with their hearts will follow them toward a peaceful better world. Those with hands will build towers not on sand, and those with a voice will sing. Evil is an abstract notion that reveals the innermost core of the individual, and also the eternal, the changing, the stagnant, and the dark.

The night blankets the world in illumination.
Evil urges a man to do what he desires, out of hatred and passion. Does this passion have any result that is worthy of man? It does, in fact, but only through those who pick up the pieces. Should criminals get away with murder? No, I donít think they should. And yet, evil cannot be contained unless society approaches it with an open mind, with conscious realization of the evil within us all. We must learn to survive not out of hatred for each-other, but out of necessity to continue to greater pursuits.

Coming terms with madness has helped shed light on the true nature of humanity. If you consciously choose to do something evil, you are only shedding illumination of the rottenness within you. A person who commits a crime should be punished, not just in a moral sense, but also helped in a cultural sense.

They should be rehabilitated so that they can come back to the real world as good people, but punishment needs to be something a human learns to accept. For punishment is also a fundamental aspect of human nature. We punish each other all the time. Those who deserve punishment are those who share no value to society. They are those who do nothing but take away from people i.e. killers and abusers. To build a tower just to see it fall is a form of self-mutilation, for humanity needs a strong-hold to continue on and progress.

Lucifer teaches us to touch the deepest scariest places of ourselves, and learn to cope with them in the best way we can. The only sin of Lucifer is ignorance. If you ignore the pain that bleeds, it will continue to bleed. Lucifer is much like the pain we feel when we get hurt, he is a warning to come to terms with our psychological needs. He is not necessarily a dark demon of hell, but he is the warning of what ignorance leads to. We part from ourselves through obeying evil, and we become better people by conquering it, acknowledging it, and moving through it.

08-21-2020, 10:38 PM
Thats probably because they never paid me. https://www.amazon.com/Miss-diagnosed-Gabrielle-Bryant-Gainer-ebook/dp/B08BQ96B8X/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=miss-diagnosed+gabrielle+bryant-gainer&qid=1598074659&sr=8-1

I made it mostly free. The cover is a collage from an old photograph. <3