Marilyn Manson Journal ArchiveMarilyn Manson Journal Archive

Marilyn Manson Journal ArchiveMarilyn Manson Journal Archive

ENTRIES 156 - 161

_____________________________________________________

From kristt7 on 02/22/03:

I was so interested to know if you ever pleased reading Baudelaire and its "Fleur du Mal". I always thougt thet there was a conection between the Dissasosiative video and Baudelaire (when the girl pick up a flower from your head- Flower of Evil) !!!

Answered by MM on 02/22/03:

Yes, of course.

_____________________________________________________

From peircedfromwithin on 02/22/03:

when theres nothing left and everything has been raped from you ,,,,what do u do then where u dont feel anything anymore your just there,, and even terrible things happen and you just dont feel anything the times when you know you should cry but dont when theres a time to smile but cant i have built a wall and cant knock the fucking shit down when all i can do is,, sit and wait but for what ,,, i dont know my mind is clutterd,, with thoughts,, i dont know what the fuck to do anymore im quite tierd of worthless fuckers telling me it gets better when everyday was seems to be the worst day of my life things dont get better ,,, im still here so im trying but whats there to look forward to when i know shits still going to fuckin happen ,,,, i have lost the will to do the things i live for,,, and thats what scares me,,,, i just dont fucking know any more,, . i will never fake a smile i will never make myself cry ,,, i do something or be something im not right now,, is there any advice,, you can possible give me,, no one will understand me,, and i never want then to but i cant keep living as a space wasted shit fuck forever

Answered by MM on 02/22/03:

If you can write that feeling than you are still alive. Just focus, you are in charge.

_____________________________________________________

From fabiostanley on 02/21/03:

Dear MM, I was watching that Jennifer Lopez movie "The Cell" and I thought it looked like something that YOU would come up with, like the "Antichrist Superstar" videos... Not the plot in itself, but the basic concept and the visuals. Were you creative consultant on that or something? And if not, isn't it a rip-off then? Best, FabioStanley

Answered by on 02/22/03:

The director was considered for "Dope Show" but we didn't work it out. We were asked to write a track for "The Cell," but I didn't have interest at the time. Rather entertaining clip though. Beautiful cinematography.

_____________________________________________________

From DeadCalm on 02/21/03:

Alright , on a serious note I would like to ask you something about Minute Of Decay on Antichrist.. Each time i'm listening Minute Of Decay I have the impression that you cry in the chorus and that make the song even more true/sad.(In a good way) What was some effects or you really cryed?

Answered by MM on 02/22/03:

I do write a bit about that in my book. It was a tough time and for better or worse that was caught on tape forever.

_____________________________________________________

From PulchraTempla on 02/21/03:

I am writing about a very serious issue. A pattern, so to speak, in the Oracle, which has expressed itself so very blatantly in the last important posted question that I feel I must respond. Why is it that when asked an extremely serious question, you don't give a straight-forward answer that concisely answers the actual question asked? I am talking in particular about the question asking what you think about a possible war. You talked about your work being an outlet to get away from the war, but you did not actually give your views. I don't want you to get mad or defensive about this because I am speaking as one intelligent person to another who sincerely wants to know why you have been skirting around such questions. I've always counted on you for direct, honest, and uncensored words, not the typical bull of evasive politicians. I completely respect you in every way, most importantly as a person, and I don't want my respect for you to decrease. I URGE you, please answer this post. If nothing else, answer this. Ignore a few people saying, "You suck!" or, "What's on the album??" to take time out for this. It matters a lot to me, and I know you've always cared about what matters to your fans. You have my support as always. But I want to know what's going on. It would be better if you even just said you did not want to express your views right now because at least you would be honest. But obviously you must see what you're doing. You're an extremely intellectual man. Please respond. If you value all you've ever stood for, please respond. It matters. -Shannon

Answered by MM on 02/22/03:

Honestly, after knowing how my father's experience in Viet Nam made him feel and the way that war was not taken seriously by many Americans...I find it hard to believe in other people's causes for war since they most likely don't care about our opinions either way. I am still taking it all in, just like you. Everyday.

_____________________________________________________

From thealmightymonstar on 02/22/03:

Im fucking pissed off like nobody would believe. There is a boy, a boy that loved me, a boy that i loved. Neither of us knew it, we slipped through each others hands, and his took that of a woman, a woman who promised to love him for ever. This woman has beaten him to a bloody pulp emotionally, she has abused his fragile state of mind and is ruining him. For 6 months i have been searching for him, and tonight i found him in the most vulnerable state i have ever seen a human being in. This boy means the world to me, he always has..he needs out and i am helpless, i cannot get him out of this pathetic situation. And i cannot put three bullets in the woman's face. I cannot place one in each of her eyes, so that she may never see the beautiful man she has ruined, i cannot place one in her mouth so that she may never beg his forgiveness once she has realized her loss. My gain you stupif cruel bitch. I spoke with this boy over the phone for the first time tonight in six months, and the element of fear, the feelings of loss that linger within him, were freakishly present in his voice. I had a hard time keeping composure, as he told me things that made me sick, as his voice quivered. I am asking you, if you believe anything is supposed to be the way it ends up. Is this boy that i love so much supposed to be miserable for the rest of his life? That is the way it has been for him for such a long time, misery, misery, misery. I can't even ask for help, i don't know who to ask i don't know what to do..i want him out, i want him out. Is there anything that can help him? I am desperate for any words to help me atleast have the strength to be a supportive friend, Danica

Answered by MM on 02/22/03:

Be a friend. Wait a few days for the wounds to heal. It's like smashing your finger...you have to let the swelling go down and see if it's broken or not. Hearts are the same way and you don't want to make things worse. I hope you find a happy ending, but just know that most are not...but we learn to cope.